Zilch

I'm empty. Out of ideas. Zero thoughts worth typing. Devoid of inspiration.
Don't waste any more of your time here today.
Go somewhere else. Anywhere else will be better than here.
Check back in on a different day.
Maybe tomorrow.
Maybe Thursday.
Maybe next week.
Just check back in at some point, okay?
Thanks

Women and Men

I don't get it.
I see gorgeous women throwing themselves into the arms of idiots.
I see intelligent women attempting to converse with men who barely graduated from high school.
I see women with amazing personalities hanging out with men who are about as personable as a hammer.

The mystifying trifecta occurs occasionally when one woman actually possesses all three qualities. It seems that sometimes these women are cursed by their blessings. How else can you explain such a woman staying in an unhealthy relationship with a man who excels at displaying adolescent behavior in all situations and cannot carry a conversation to save his life, unless it involves crude jokes, profanity and generally no point whatsoever?

I plead women everywhere to rise above these pathetic scenarios.
I beg you to begin searching for men of higher quality and substance.
I implore you to begin demanding the respect and admiration that you deserve.

Don't let the world nullify your right to be treated as a lady.

Don't be intimidated by the feminists of the world who are enraged by a gentlemen opening a door for you. Let them be appalled and open the door for themselves. And in doing so, may they be exposed to millions of germs that have the potential to make them ill. Allow the man to show you that he wants to go out of his way to make you comfortable and provide for you.

Just because a man treats you with dignity and respect does not mean that he is trying to belittle you. On the contrary, such a man is trying his best to show you how much he wants to be with you. If he didn't care, he would try to do these things. Simply accept his kind offers and say "Thank you".

Now I understand that there are some real pricks out there that take every opportunity to exert their position as men and demean women at every turn. These men deserve a special place in Hell where they can be taunted with large containers of water and ice for all eternity.

Women of the world unite. You have the power to change the way men treat you.
Expect more.
Demand more.
If a guy is being an idiot, call him on it.
If a guy is neglecting you or mistreating you, leave him.
If a guy is mistreating you or abusing you verbally, slap him and leave.
If a guy is abusing you physically, run away and call the police.

You know you are worth it.
... and believe it or not, there are some men out there who recognize these facts.

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

I finally saw Tim Burton's interpretation of "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" this past weekend. I am one of those people who enjoy the Gene Wilder film "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory", so I went into this film as open-minded as possible. I enjoyed the silly songs in the previous film and I never found the goofiness of it all to be too much for me to enjoy the film. I had heard and read that this film was darker than the 1971 adaptation, so I wasn't quite sure what to expect.

I have never read the book that both of these movies are based on, so I cannot speak to how well the storyline of the movies follow that of the book. However, I will say that everyone that I know that has read the book says that Tim Burton's film is very close to the book in the way it flows and the characters that it portrays. All that being said, I found some of the characters to be almost indistinguishable. For instance, with the exception of the scenes of their respective demises, little spoiled brats Violet Beauregarde and Veruca Salt could almost be rolled into one character who adds very little to the storyline of the film. Almost without exception, the parents of these children are basically just background players throughout the movie, adding little dialogue, little character and even less emotion.

There are obvious exceptions to this general character malaise. Johnny Depp adds another feather to his cap of weired, eccentric, odd and basically beloved characters. He has successfully made a career out of playing roles that are both challenging and bizarre and somehow making them adorable. His characterization of Willy Wonka is outlandishly creepy, ghostly pale and self-absorbed while yet unashamedly entertaining, fantastically colorful and driven by the desire for acceptance of others. I'm not sure it is worthy of the honor of winning, but I believe he has successfully made the argument for an Academy Award Nomination. He may not win the Oscar, but he definitely deserves the nod for pulling off a complex caracter that others would have failed at delivering.

The zany antics of the Oompa Loompas throughout the movie were extremely entertaining and witty. Deep Roy can now simply hand a copy of this film to any director in the industry to prove his range, ability and expression capabilities. Truly he has captured every aspect of the Oompa Loompas in his multiple impersonations. I sat there thinking about how many different takes he must have performed in order to create the many musical scenes and was blown away. This man must have been crazy busy throughout the filming of this movie. If nothing else, Deep Roy deserves a lot of credit and respect within the industry.

Overall, I wasn't blown away by this movie, but wasn't bored by it either. I found parts of it rather entertaining and other parts of it seemed bland or contrived. The story moved along well and the dialogue was tolerable. If you loved the Gene Wilder adaptation of the book you might like this film, but only if you are willing to allow this film to be its own creature. It is not a remake, it is its own movie with its own creative direction. If you hated the previous film, you might like this one because it does forge its own direction and forsake some of the aspects of the other film. If you enjoyed the book, I am told that you will thoroughly enjoy this film and that you will appreciate it more than the 1970s film. If you haven't ever read the book or seen the other film, then I think that you will enjoy this film a lot.

Overall, it was a bizarre trip through a technocolor world as interpreted only as Tim Burton could visualize and bring to reality on film. You knew that when he and Johnny Depp signed on to tackle this film that it would definitely be interesting and strange. Neither one has disappointed in their own way and I think that is why people are so willing to accept it and find themselves actually enjoying it.

The Green and the Brown

Last night my wife and I decided we should do the lawnwork that we have been putting off for about a week. The grass had grown to about 4 inches and the trimming was starting to look a little less than well-defined. So we ventured out into the yard to battle the heat, the grass and the bugs.

With it being so dry for so long this summer, yardwork has been relatively easy and sporadic. With just a little rain every couple of weeks, it has actually been a battle to keep the grass alive. I have found myself watering the lawn several times as I have begun to see dead spots appearing in the yard. Now our yard is by no means healthy, weed-free or well groomed, but I like to keep some grass throughout most of the yard, as to avoid the dusty, bare dirt brown spots that have been trying to form.

One of our neighbors, on the other hand, is your typical "lawn guy". He works very hard at trying to keep his lawn lush, green and well-groomed. He is constantly watering, fertilizing, inspecting and manicuring his yard. It looks pretty good, but it is nothing spectacular. He must find a great deal of satisfaction in working on his lawn, because their is nobody else around him who really seems to give a rip. He spends so much time working on his yard that I rarely see him sitting down and enjoying it for what it is. It seems kind of ironic to me to work so hard at something and to never take a few moments to sit back and enjoy the result.

I'm sure that if I were obsessed with having a "perfect" lawn I would find this summer to be totally exhausting, both physically and financially. Thankfully, I just enjoy having a lawn of any sort, and the fact that it is currently mostly covered with grass that is barely staying alive is okay by me. Our lawn may not be the greenest in the subdivision and it may not be the most full, but we are enjoying it as much (if not more) as our neighbors are enjoying theirs.

NASA's Discovery

If I were on board the Space Shuttle Discovery right now, I would pretty much want to climb on board the International Space Station and wave goodbye to my crewmates and wait for the next Russian ship to come pick me up for the flight home. Let's recap this trip into space:

Launch gets delayed due to fuel sensor issues;
shuttle is back on launch pad despite incomplete resolution of the sensor issue;
shuttle gets launched and the cone of the fuel tank hits a bird immediately after liftoff;
video of debris falling off the rocket is captured during liftoff;
shuttle performs the first ever "full pitch maneuver" while in orbit underneath the International Space Station so onboard cameras can assist in determining any damage to the shuttle during liftoff;
there appears to be two places where gap filler is sticking out from between the heat-resistant tiles on the underside of the shuttle;
NASA engineers determine that the filler might retain too much heat upon re-entry and come up with a way to remove the filler;
Astronaut Steve Robinson completes the first ever repair of the shuttle while in space successfully removing the two gap fillers

And now NASA is investigating an apparent tear of the thermal blanket below the cockpit window which would not pose an immediate threat to the safety of the astronauts during initial re-entry, but might come off and cause significant damage to the shuttle after it slows down from Mach 20 to Mach 6 (that's six times the speed of sound). It is possible that another spacewalk would have to be conducted to repair the thermal blanket, although at this point in time NASA is saying that is unlikely.

What else could possibly happen during this trip? Thankfully, there were no issues during the docking to the Space Station. With all the time that the astronauts have been having to work on the Discovery just to make it presumably safe for the trip home, how much have they really been able to focus on the actual objectives of the mission. If it were me up there, you'd better be believing that I would be concentrating much more on fixing my ride home than any scientific experiment that you could possibly want me to perform. Screw the insects, mold and other living organisms in little vials or jars, let's make sure we get home in one piece!

Looking at the schedule for the Discovery, one has to wonder if NASA went out of their way to make sure the landing is an early morning affair. The Space Shuttle Discovery will be re-entering the Earth's atmosphere around 3:45am om Monday, August 8th. It's a safe bet that there won't be a lot of people watching television during that time or looking up at the sky.

I think it's safe to say that it is well beyond time for NASA to review the Shuttle program and either replace the ships with new models or replace the program in its entirety. If we are intent on sending people into space, then let's make sure we are sending them in the best possible vehicle with the best possible equipment. Anything less is not only an insult to our country's prosperity and technological capabilities, but more importantly, it is an insult to the brave and itelligent men and women who go there on our behalf.

Here's to the crew of the Space Shuttle Discovery.
May God bless you and bring you home safely.