Keeper of the Stuff

Shameless admission follows...

I keep stuff. That's right. I keep it. I don't collect it or gather it or even necessarily purchase it, but I keep it. You know, all the junk that people give you as little joke gifts. Little presents from nieces and nephews that serve absolutely no purpose and are of no monetary value. Yep, I got it all.

Little McDonald's Happy Meal toys (still in the wrapper no less) of animated movie characters. Little figurines of dogs, cats, squirrels, elephants (I've almost got the entire animal selection offered by the St. Louis Zoo). I've got little inflatable toys that may or not still hold air. I have little nuts and bolts that go to something somewhere that will never be used.

Why do I have all of this junk? I told you - I keep stuff.

Some of it is more understandable than others. For instance, I have the birthday card my grandmother gave me 9 months before she passed on. That makes sense - it's sentimental junk. And yes, I readily admit to being quite the sentimental guy. But over the years all of this stuff adds up.

Last night I decided to begin sifting through this mass of stuff to see what I could get rid of. It's a hard task. It's very time consuming. It can be emotionally draining. But it is something I have needed to do for a very long time.

I went through all the presents and small junk pretty quickly. Then it was on to the harder stuff. Letters, cards, notes. This stuff takes forever to go through. You have to open up the card to see what it is, or perhaps it's a letter in an envelope which requires extra time. Each piece adds up and suddenly you have spent an hour going through a handful of items.

So last night I went through a box that was filled with notes from friends and past flames. It's quite a thing to sit down and read what was going on in your life 10 years ago. I think it can be healthy to a point. However, I also feel that I need to move beyond that and clean out these remanants of my past. So tonight I plan on finishing this task by showing all of these letters to the trash can. I refuse to live in the past, so why should I keep letters from people in my past?

Now don't get me wrong here. I will keep some of the sentimental cards and letters from family and friends, but the other junk is going away. It's a rainy week, so I figure I may as well clean out my junk while I don't have the option to go outside and do anything else...

A Song For Kristen

Well, well... STLBlogger of the Week...
The contest details have yet to be fully determined, but I present the following song to Kritter with nothing but love...

Knowing Kristen's fondness for Chris Thile, and virtually all things NickelCreek, and seeing is how that is how I first came into communication with her, I offer the following lyrics to be sung to the tune of "When You Come Back Down"

Only What You Type
I can't believe it now,
Kritter how you've grown
When you started this
Who would have ever known
That you'd earn this perk

You've given us a peek
Into your life
You've spoken from within
About your strife
And a CD in the works

<Chorus>
When you're blogging on the web,
Be careful what you write
We all know what you've read
And What you've said
By only what you type, only what you type.

Blogger of the Week
A title given to few
So this week is yours
Who knows it may be two
Enjoy it while you can

<Chorus>

<Bridge>
The stories that you've documented
Are always fun to read
Thank you for sharing with us
Kristen a reminder we do plead...

<Chorus>

Window Waving

Over the last 3 months, I have begun my weekday mornings with a little routine as I leave the apartment. You see, I live on the second floor of the building and I know that the couple who live below me have a young boy (2-3 years old). "My" parking space happens to be right outside the window of the room this little boy calls his own. Most mornings, regardless of what time, I will get into my car, put my seatbelt on and proceed to turn the key.

Now, occasionally the engine will not turn over on the first try, so I will sit there and have to make 3 or 4 attempts. (I'm sure this could be repaired, but I can't afford that at this point in time.) It's not a huge deal, but it is annoying.

Well, I began to notice that every time I started my car this little boy would suddenly pop up unto the window and peek out through the blinds that he successfully ruined months ago. There are now 3 slats of the blinds missing at precisely his eye level, so his view is not hindered in any way. In my attempt to interact with children and in some way get to know my neighbors, I began to wave at this little fellow everytime I saw him. Sometimes he would pop up when I returned from being out and about, so I would wave at him. Each time he would simply stare back at me and sometimes growl quite loudly. I guess he's a growler - that's fine. I continued this ritual of waving and smiling at him.

Nothing.

Until yesterday morning. I started the car up (first try no less) and here came his little head to the separated blinds. I paused a moment and watched him. Then I gave him a huge smile and waved. Suddenly, in a moment of beautiful simplicity, this little boy raised his hand and gave me the "I'll-bend-my-fingers-only-at-you" wave. Success! I will readily admit that I sat there stunned, yet immediately filled with a sense of renewed purpose. I waved back. So did he.

Months of nothing in return. Empty staring. Fierce howling and growling. Peek-a-boo from behind the blinds. All instantly worth it.

So today as I walked out to fire up the vehicle I wondered what the little fellow would do today. Would he wave back? Would he just stare? Perhaps give me the "I-hope-you-have-a-great-day" growl? Nope. Nothing. Today he didn't appear at the window. It saddened me to a point, but I realize he isn't always there. And I realize we are making great, small strides in our budding relationship. And I know that when I come home tonight I will have another opportunity to say hello to my new friend.

Sometimes that's all you can hope for - another chance to say hello to a friend.
Sometimes a blank stare is more than sufficient to drive a point home.
Sometimes a friend has to growl at you to prove that they are listening/watching.
Sometimes they will play games with you.

Sometimes they won't be there when you hope they are. It doesn't mean they are bad friends, it's just that their life has taken them away from the window for a while.

Or perhaps it's nap time and they are sleeping peacefully under the window pane that has brought you a friendly greeting (in whatever way in may be expressed).

An Order of Friends to Go

I just stopped in at one of the local fast food places to grab lunch. I used to stop in here a couple of times a week, but now I only drive through about every 3 weeks or so. Today, as I walked through the door, the smell instantly brought to mind a friend of mine. We had gone to school together and then worked together up until I was laid off. We used to meet up for lunch at this place, mainly because she loved it. We would talk politics, religion, sports, life and music over a long lunch. It was always refreshing and enjoyable. Last year she moved to DC after accepting a wonderful job. I miss those conversations. I miss her more than I thought I did.

I never knew that I had tied that restaurant's smell to her until today.

Chores Conquered

I spent the majority of the weekend inside cleaning up the apartment. You know how there are things that you want/need to do but never have time for? Well, I tried to take care of some of those things this weekend. I mingled in enough time outside to feel satisfied that I hadn't missed the entire weekend by being inside. It was a bit too hot and humid for me, but that is nothing new. So I chilled inside (thermostat around 69) and relaxed some yesterday. It was a fairly productive weekend.

Sex Offenders Listed

In order to keep your children safe, and to protect yourself, find out who's in your neighborhood and what they've done.

Missouri State Highway Sex Offender Information Page

If this site has crashed again, let me know and I can e-mail you the lists I grabbed for St. Charles County and St. Louis County.

Big Green Ogres

I went to see Shrek2 at the theater last night. There was a decent crowd for a Wednesday night, but it was only 80% full. As expected, there were a lot of children there with their parents. I'm not sure who laughed more, the parents or the children. This movie is a lot like Toy Story - a lot of the references and word puns go way over the younger one's heads. However, I think the film is engaging enough for the little tikes to enjoy it. I didn't hear any complaints from those around me. Overall, it was a decent little film, with some parts that were quite funny. It's good to laugh in public from time to time...

Oh, and the game on the website is quite entertaining. I especially enjoyed the "Pinnochio Treehouse Mix", which can be found in the Versarchery store with the other Shops.

Late Night with the Policeman

I was driving home last night a couple hours after midnight down the all familiar two lane road that has become my main travel vein over the past few years. There was nobody out, and I was taking it a bit slower than the posted pace, due to the rain that had fallen and the deer that I had previousy seen. I came over a small hill and saw a car approaching in the oncoming lane. Respectfully, I switched off my hi-beams at almost the same time as the other vehicle did the same. This makes me happy when people choose to not blind me while driving towards me. The car passed and out of the corner of my eye I noticed the lights mounted on its roof.

Well, I knew it was a county policeman instantly but I also knew I wasn't speeding or swerving or doing anything to attract attention. However, as soon as that thought crossed my mind I thought of another more likely scenario. I came to the conclusion that this officer would most likely turn around and follow me for a bit. You know how it goes. They come up on you a bit faster than you are going and try to goad you into going a bit too fast and then, *flash*, they pull you over for speeding. While it has never happened to me (I don't tend to speed), I have seen it happen numerous times to unsuspecting drivers. Although I hate it and I think it is wrong, I know to expect it.

So I continue my drive towards my bed at my reasonable speed when about a minute later I notice headlights creeping up on me from behind. Here comes the officer out to write a ticket. I remain within my lane at my safe pace with this car all up on me for about 2 minutes. At this point I am thinking he will either choose to pass me by or turn around at the next possible opportunity since I am not doing anything illegal.

*Flash*

As I pull of to the side of the road, I am trying to figure out why this policeman has pulled me over. I wasn't speeding or driving recklessly. I don't have any warrants out for my arrest. The car is registered in my name. Could it be my plates/stickers? Nope - they are good till September. So I sit in my driver's seat waiting to hear why I have just been pulled over.

The officer walks up and asks for my license and registration, which I promptly provide him. And this conversation follows:
Him: You out here camping tonight?
Me: No sir. I was just on my way home from my girlfriend's house. (Thinking - if I were camping I wouldn't be driving right now I would be sleeping.)
Him: I see. Well, I pulled you over to warn you that I've seen about 50 deer on this road tonight, and I noticed that you brake light was out.
Me: It is? Which one? (I have had trouble with one light in particular, I think it is a short. I've replaced it multiple times.)

Blah. Blah. Blah...
So he goes back to his car and runs my info through his little computer-checker machine. All the time I am waiting thinking "You didn't turn around to pull me over to tell me about deer. you wanted to ticket me and had to wait for me to tap my brakes in order to give you a reason to turn on your increbily bright lights at this hour..."

He comes back to the door and gives me back my license. He notices that I have a bottle of Heet on the floor in the back of my car and asks me about it. He then asks me to step out of the car so he can check the remainder of the vehicle. He then pats me down to make sure I don't have any weapons, and proceeds to have me sit in the backseat of the patrol car. He proceeds to lock me in and pick through my car. When he gets done with the interior, he goes to the trunk and searches through it as well.

He comes back and lets me out of his car and tells me that due to the abundance of meth labs in the area the police are trying to be more proactive in their efforts to stop the criminals. He informs me that Heet and Ice Melt are two of the ingredients used to make meth. He also informs me that since I didn't have any sudoephedrine (one of the main ingredients) in the vehicle it was not a problem. He wishes me a good night and I am back on my way.

All of this took 25 minutes. I lost 25 minutes of sleep last night because a policeman was eager to write a late-night ticket. I got patted down, put in a patrol car and had my vehicle searched because I had some very common items in my car. I'm not the happiest citizen in the world right now. I had done nothing wrong. I had not broken any laws on the roadway, yet I was singled out and followed. I had purchased some items for the winter that I have not removed yet from my car, and I was treated as a possible criminal for it.

Let's be clear. I'm all for being proactive, but this was ridiculous. It isn't like I had 10 bottles of Heet with me or 20lbs of Ice Melt in my trunk. How much meht could I possibly make from one bottle of Heet and a half a bag of salt? I can only imagine what would have happened if he had pulled me over last week when I had a Walmart bag filled with Sinus/Allergy pills and other OTC medications. I think I would have been arrested for being a suspected methamphetamine maker and dealer.

So be careful if you ever buy any seasonal products for your car or home. You might get to spend 25 minutes with a policeman ont he side of the road late at night or possibly go to jail as a suspected felon.

Appreciate This

One thing I learned years ago is that you never mistreat the people who clean the building you work in. In fact, it is my practice to attempt to befriend them or at least get to know them by name (and vice versa).
Why?

Well, because first and foremost, they are people. Respect doesn't stop when the timecard is punched. These people are working hard and doing their job to the best of their ability. In a lot of cases, they are doing more work than most of the people who walk past them.

I have also learned that the janitorial/maintenance staff can be your most powerful ally when you need assistance. If you know them by name and give them the respect they deserve, they will be much more willing to assist you when you need it. In times where you need a door opened, a mess cleaned or any other random request, these people can make it happen for you. And if you are in their good graces and they repsect you, they are more willing and likely to get around to helping you a lot faster than they normally might.

So here's to the maintenance/janitorial staff of the world. I tip my hat to you, keep my trash in the can, avoid touching the glass on the doors and respect the work you do. Our workplaces wouldn't be the same without you!

Simply Gorgeous

Just in case you just crawled out from under a rock, I want to let you know that the weather outside this weekend was phenomenal. If you didn't get to go play outside at some point, then I feel really sorry for you. There was quite a bit going on around the St. Louis metro area this weekend. What did you do out under the sun?

Stuffed With Hugs

I saw something about this on the morning news.
Regardless of your stance on the current situation in the Middle East, this is a very worthy cause.
Lots of children are being affected every day.
Here's a chance to give them something to smile about.

Operation Stuffed With Hugs

Shriek! and Gag!

Worst photo of the day.
I swear Quentin Tarantino is possessed and Sophia Coppola is the absolutely worst dressed woman of the decade. He comes up with some of the sickest things since the Holocaust and she seems to always have a terrible outfit that just simply doesn't accentuate anything.

A Call to Arms

As promised, here is my post regarding chivalry - "A Call to Arms".
Since the post would have been forever long, I have placed it as an individual web page.

Shower Power

Have you ever had a morning where you woke up and decided the absolute best thing for you at that moment was an incredibly long, hot shower? That was the feeling that took over my thought processes this morning. Forget about everything else and hop into the shower. It's such a relaxing place. Out of earshot of the noises beyond my apartment. Beyond being bombarded by the television or radio or telephone. Presented with no tasks but to allow the water to pour over you relentlessly.

Why would I need such a getaway first thing in the morning? I have no idea, but I don't plan on ceasing to satisfy that urge when it overtakes me.

I think I could live in the shower somedays...

A Day of Drops

I listened to the weather before coming to work this morning and was told that some showers might move into the area late this afternoon or this evening. It became cloudy at 9am and has stayed that way ever since. I checked the Weather Channel and they show a 20% chance of rain later this afternoon. I just ran out to close my car windows, because it is raining quite heavily at the moment. Good grief...

On the way back from the car I came across a little birdie lying on its side on the sidewalk. For some reason this really bothered me. My apartment complex has a ton of birds, and so occassionally I might come across a fallen egg or even a birdling. For some reason, this little fellow touched a nerve and I have the sudden desire to bury it. But I can't really do that here at work, and now it is raining out.

This day just keeps going south, and I don't like it...

Oh Baby! A new Governor perhaps?!?

I believe that the way the St. Louis Blues have handled the employment of Ken Wilson is atrocious and incredibly disrespectful - not to mention unprofessional. Here's a man that for twenty years has been the voice of the Note, and has been one of the St. Louis area's most vocal proponents. And the Blues management sends him packing and criticizes his performance. All this after Wilson was recognized just this past January at the Savvis for his talent, and profiled just last month in the St. Louis Commerce Magazine.

I have grown up listening to Ken Wilson announce Blues hockey. I have listened to him announce the goals, the fights, the penalties, the stats, the chaos and everything else in between. I have heard him speak truthfully about what he thinks of skills and deficiencies of the team, it's players and coaches. I don't ever recall him ripping anyone apart on the air, and I don't ever recall him bashing the management. I've heard him exult when the Blues score and play well, and I have heard him pronounce his verdict of inadequacies when appropriate. He always seemed to speak what he saw and not make it all sound wonderful when it wasn't. The man loved hockey, and I believe he truly loved the fans in St. Louis.

I think the following quote from Ken is a perfect reflection of all of these facts:
“Blues fans are very ardent and loyal. They’re hungry to win a Stanley Cup. It’s frustrating but kind of an adventure to get to that final destination. In the meantime players, owners, coaches, even announcers may come and go, but St. Louis Blues fans will carry on. It’s a wonderful phenomenon.”

I wish the best for Ken Wilson and his family, in whatever arena he decides to throw his hat/voice.

I pause in wonder at what the Blues might just do next...

Man, I miss the Old Barn...

A Lack of Desire/Passion

I had originally planned to post something along the topic of chivalry in the new millenium, but I just don't have the necessary passion to dive into that topic at the moment. Perhaps I will feel motivated sometime this weekend to work on it a bit and post something about it on Monday...

Until that time, rest assured that courtesy and manners and respect are not dead, they are just a lot harder to find...

Answering the Call

Well, my friend Kristen seems to have touched on a little topic that relates well with other women readers. She poses several questions in her post today, which nicely set the stage for a blog discussion. I was not sure if I would respond or not, but at her personal invite to do so, I offer the following (please note that my opinion does not represent anyone else or the male gender at large):

Where to start? Well, the whole idea of responsibility with regards to who should do what is intriguing and frustrating. I think perhaps it depends on what type of a person you are interested in. Some people find that the proactive approach suits their personality and they have no inhibitions about approaching the person they are attracted to. Other people would never dream of being the "aggressor" when it comes to relationships, so they will wait for someone to come to them.

With men it goes both ways. Some find a "stand-offish" type of woman incredibly appealing, and they prefer to initiate contact. However, others would love to have a woman come up to them and start the conversation. You have to use caution here, as some men might find being approached by a woman intimidating or a bit frightening. They may make the assumption that the woman is aggressive or a control freak, and it might just scare them away.

And then there is the additon of the group(s) and their dynamics. People in groups act differently then they do alone. If it were a situation where the lone male is sitting at the bar and you caught his eye, his response could be determined based ont he group you are with. If he thinks the group is tolerable and non-threatening he might comeover and initiate conversation. If he is not feeling comfortable with the group, he may not come over. Perhaps he might attempt to catch you away from the table on your own.

However, the addition of the male group totally throws a wrench into any of the above scenarios. Why? Well, simply put, the man has a lot more on the line now. Before it was just him. If he walked over and got blown off, he can disappear from your group and go home and cry into his pillow. Now, if he attempts to initiate and gets disregarded he has to come back to a table filled with cruel friends, who might unrelentingly tease him forever. So he has a lot more pressure on him before he even stands to leave the table. Especially if he makes mention of you at the table and the other guys are aware of what might be unfolding when he makes his move. It's a lot of pressure to overcome in order to take that stand in that moment.

Exception to the above - If the other person appears to blatently go out of their way to see you or be around you then that is a green light to make the attempt. The guy in the group should become incredibly confidant after receiving such signals and should, in fact, want to make that move. Why? Because he doesn't have as much to fear. You have already shown him you are at least interested in him, so he has a better chance at not getting shot down.

It all comes down to the people involved. If you are sending heavy signals, then he shouldn't worry about either of the groups. If you are being a bit sly about the signals he may not know how to interpret them, and will play it safe more often times than not. If you have the urge to initiate and that doesn't bother you, go for it. Just remember that he might take that the wrong way as well. It all depends on the players.

A direct question to the ladies would be that if you send such obvious signals to a guy (regardless of groups or situation) and he does not respond in a positive manner, is he worth it? If he's too scared to get off of his rear and approach you do you really want to spend any amount of time with him at all? If he can't interpret the blatent signals youare sending then perhaps he's a complete idiot or perhaps he is already with someone. If he's so influenced by his buddies to keep to his seat, then why bother with him at all?

The games continue...

And I will post something here in the coming days regarding the decline of chivalry and what women could/should do to change it.

My Neighborhood

If you had moved into my apartment building three years ago, you might have thought "This neighbiorhood is kind of weird, but it's not bad."

If you visited my neighborhood today you might think "It's kind of strange, but tolerable."

If you were to visit my apartment tonight (or any night) you would think "This place is trashy. The people are idiots and the neighborhood is becoming a slum."

And you would be right.

I've watched some decent people move out. They all leave for various reasons, but most of them either have small children or are expecting them when they leave. I've watched a ton of nasty, creepy, moronic people move in. They like to yell a lot at various hours of the night (and day), walk around with their beer bellies exposed (male and female), drive their car or truck down the road at 50mph (all the while it sounds like it will explode) or let their incredibly young children wander the street until well after midnight (they like to ride their bikes and big wheelers under the streetlight).

Yep, my neighborhood has gone down the crapper. It makes me sad and upset.

If the landlords would be a bit more selective, the neighborhood would change for the better. The buildings wouldn't be abused as they are now, and more cool people would want to move in. The nicer the neighborhood becomes, the more they could increase rent and make more money, which will also change the demographic of the residents.

But the landlords don't get it and don't care. They want their easy money now. Nevermind the fact that in the next 5 years these buildings will have to be renovated due to the way the current residents live their pathetic, dingy, derelict lives.

Money talks and the landlords are so near-sighted that they don't see that their investment is quickly becoming a ghetto.

I can't wait to move out of here. I'm hoping that happens in October.
Until then, I lose sleep to the inconsiderate embeciles who like to stand outside my window and yell in conversation with each other at 3am.

I want a place where I can walk down the street and say "Hello" to someone and stop and chat for a while.
I want to not worry about those neighborhood children out late at night.
I want to live in a place where my visitors feel safe and welcome and not intimidated, fearful, disgusted or embarrassed.

Oh, how I long for that day...

A Message of Hope From Iraq

I just finished reading this letter from Josh Eckhoff, a graduate of Parkway South High School last yera who is now in Iraq. I came across it in the St Louis Business Journal and felt led to post the link.

Please read his letter home to his fellow students when you get a chance.
Powerful words from a young man serving his country overseas.

My prayers extend to those both overseas and directly affected here at home.
God Bless You!

Hallway Meetings

I have a confession to make. I have a major pet peeve that I feel led to share with the world (or whomever might find their way to this little page).
I hate hallway meetings.

You know - the type of meetings where two or more people congregate in the hallway spontaneously to discuss whatever they feel led to blabber on about. Sometimes it is work related; most times it is not. Yet there they stand, chattering away with total disregard for anyone else around them. These meetings seem to usually take place in one of two locations.

The first place is typically in an area that is sure to cause the most congestion. These are the meetings where the attendees stand either immediately in or in front of a main doorway, or perhaps in a small hallway that see a ton of traffic. The second location is chosen based on how many people might possibly hear the discussion or see the meeting taking place. This is the meeting that either occurs right outside the office door or perhaps on the other side of a row of cubicles.

While I have been told that these discussions used to take place over the water cooler or in the break room, it is obvious that these meetings have now migrated into the common space of all the other employees who are actually doing work. It appears to me that the people who are the most common offenders in holding these impromtu gatherings are in all actuality the people who seem to accomplish the least amount of work.

I have two theories as to why these meetings exist.
Reason number one - These people are in a tremendous hurry and think that these meetings are productive and help produce quicker results. What they fail to realize is that their "productive" meeting is usually detrimental to others around them.
Reason number two - These people are trying to look or sound busy in order to perpetuate the idea that they are doing work. They might also be trying to impress others by what they say or how they sound. These folks fail to realize that more times than not they sound like chattering chimps, which might be cute at first, but quickly becomes very annoying.
Reason number three - These people are just plain arrogant, rude or oblivious to the fact that they are being disruptive. They have no idea that they are standing in the way of others. They don't realize that their voice carries over that partition they are leaning on or through that open door they are standing next to. They don't recognize that they could take this little meeting into their office, the breakroom, one of the many conference rooms designed for this purpose or even outside (it's nice out people!)

If you are reading this, please take into mind how your actions might affect those around you while at work. Try to keep in mind that there are others around you who have places to go, people to have actual meetings with (in the appropriate places) and work to get done. We don't need or want to hear about what you are working on or what happened last night at your house, unless we initiate such a discussion.

Thank you for your consideration of others while at work!

Diocese Found in Contempt

If you have nothing to hide and are truly wanting to help people who may have been abused in the past, wouldn't you do everything in your power to assist that process? Now, I am not sure how the records in question might help the case, but it is interesting that the diocese has been found in contempt of the court for basically refusing to cooperate. I don't think that this helps paint a better picture for the Catholic church locally, which already has faced severe criticism for it's handling of abuse cases/victims by S.N.A.P..

There She Blows!

Another nugget to be filed in the "We are complete and utter morons" department. Thank goodness I am not associated in any way with these idiots.